When you realize that you are the one in control of your life and take full responsibility for it, you will find peace and you will be aware of what you are creating on a day to day basis. You will understand that you get what you think about most of the time. It can be so simple to realize that, however, we must be coming to these realizations and cognitions often because it will take minutes to learn and a lifetime to master the full awareness of what we are creating in our life. Sometimes things do not always go as we expect, and it is for a reason. You decide whether the situation will be a benefit to you someway somehow or not be. Every experience can be a learning one if you choose to be open to growing and looking for the gold in the situations you are facing.
The first concept to make your life easier and keep you in a positive emotional state is; in life you have to care, but not that much. It is important to not let external things disrupt you internally. Everything that happens comes from the decisions you make in all of the different events you have come across. If you get mad or frustrated it is because you are letting something else take your power away. When something does not go our way we have to care and be aware, thinking about how we are feeling while also not being attached to what is happening and accepting what is as it is. A big reason we tend to care too much is because we want to control everything, we do not have patience and become frustrated by always predicting what is going to happen and should happen. The fact is you are not that smart (you are not capable of controlling everything). Getting frustrated for not getting what you thought should be is unreasonable and you are wasting time, energy, and power by even caring (putting focused energy) about something you do not want in your life.
The point is the only thing you should be caring about is not the events that are occurring in your life but your response to events in your life. Events in your life are long set up by the things you have been thinking about and are so used to thinking about. Events are made up of the decisions you have made prior to it happening. You should only care about your responses to these events. Your response is the only thing you will ever be able to control. The events are there for you to make your next move. Your next move will determine the outcome and a new event will occur in which you will have a similar or different response to make. Every decision you make comes from prior awareness of what is going on in your life.
Instead of having needs have minor preferences. You do not need to get your way all the time. When you detach from the thing that you really really want is when most of the time it will come in. When you lose something and are looking for it, you are so focused on the need that you are really focusing on the lack of having it. The moment you are unfocused on the lack and relax on the fact that it is gone you might see it right in front of your eyes or you'll remember where you last placed it. When you are going out and you need to go to this place, you are basing your whole mood on something outside of yourself. I find when I have a minor preference toward something, I might not get my way, however, being calm and happy no matter what happens somehow helps things turn out the way I wanted or perhaps even better than I expected!